Remembering our Babies

October 15th, 2014

For those of you who don't know, October is National Pregnancy, Infant, and Child Loss Awareness Month.  October 15th is a day of remembrance.  Tonight at 7pm everyone across the nation lights a candle and lets it burn for one hour.  This creates a 'wave' of light.  If you or someone you know has suffered the loss of a baby in miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant loss due to any cause, light a candle tonight in remembrance of them.

Before Joel and I started talking about having children I never realized how many babies are lost.  My older sister started having kids before any of our friends.  It was the first time I experienced someone losing a baby.  She suffered too many miscarriages.  I never understood the pain she felt.  Joel and I had a miscarriage before Liam and it broke our heart.  After that we only had a glimpse of the pain her family was feeling.  Right now I know at least nine ladies who have lost at least one baby through miscarriage.  Before we lost Jonah I didn't know anyone who had lost a baby to stillbirth or early infant loss.  After we lost him I have had numerous people tell me their experience in the loss of their baby.  It breaks my heart to know other people had to experience something like this.  A pain that will never go away.  What I've learned from talking to people is that you don't move on from it or forget about it.  All you do is learn to live with it.  All of these people still mourn the loss of their child years later.  Part of that is scary to think I may be sad years down the road but the other part of me feels relief.  Relief that I won't ever forget about my 2nd son, Jonah Donovan Naylor.

Did you know?....

Today is a way to honor all of those babies who have been lost.  So I encourage you, even if you aren't that 1 out of 4 who has lost a baby, light a candle tonight.  Know that someone you know out there probably has experienced one kind of loss.

On Jonah's original due date, September 16th, 2014, my mother took me to pottery hollow, a place where you paint pottery.  She wanted to take me somewhere where I could honor and remember Jonah.  I painted this lantern.  This will forever be his lantern and we will burn the candle in it to remember him.